I Need This….

I need this

Periodically I second guess me

Getting confused within reality

It is not always clear what I feel

Humanity locked into my own fantasy

I would tell you I was real

But I don’t know me in reality

Finding too much pleasure in dreams

Consciously I live subconsciously

Where nothing in this world

Could have control over me

But regardless of how desperately I move

There has always been thoughts of you

The challenge is knowing and believing

That you have those thoughts too….

I need this

Just to know for sure

That you love me for sure

That all those thoughts are not random

I want to know the what ifs

And the if I knew then what I know now

I want to believe you think of me

This is crazy to think

If I were my own friend

What advice would I give

Knowing the exact circumstances

We both know who’s at home

Yet in a moments notice

We are both ready to roam

Knowledge is not power

It is a vain understanding

Because I powerfully love you

Yet I never take action

Afraid of the outcome

Afraid I would lose you….

I need this

If you do this one thing

Every time you have a thought of me

Write it down in detail

What you are thinking

The time of day

Is it a week day or the weekend

I can guarantee if I do the same thing

Then we compare notes after 7 days

We will both see the same thing

Because I am intertwined with you

Connected to you

Aligned into the spiritual realm

As if we are from the same womb

Without your sincerity I am lost

Walking the earth aimlessly

Dreaming of a time

When I wished you were mine

Preventing my ego from letting you go

There is nothing more real

Than when you say my whole name

I lose sight of every objective

Melting in your perspective

Thanking you every breath I have left….

I need this

If I cannot have you directly

Fuck it, let it be me indirectly

Be an eternal side jawn

I don’t care what you do while I’m gone

You could be with whoever all day long

Just make sure that shit is clean

Looking mean

Feed me that sweet brown honey

As soon as I get home

All we need to do is keep this going

Always making sure it is right

I will never leave you angry

Every word I give you will be the truth

Never even signs of jealously

Not wasting a single emotion unnecessarily

All the energy I have

Being used to make it last

Filling your pleasure senses

Pushing you to your physical limit

I want you dreaming about this shit

Waking up in the middle about this night

Thanking God we did this shit