Forgiveness?

I heard about you

People stay talking about you

Telling me I need to meet you

Somehow I need to get to know you

They kept saying I need some time with you

Telling me how nice you are

Speaking as if we ever met

The world would be so different

The crazy part

They never tell me how you look

Only describing emotion intelligent things

As if those things have meaning

Expecting me to show a sign of softness

Forgiveness?

Forgiveness?

Let me tell you like this

I know how to treat people

And if you want to be

One of those people

Just know

I will tell you

Like I told them

Everything is everything

We can even pretend to be friends

But if you dare cross me in anyway

You better watch for what’s coming your way

I will cut you off with the quickness

Forgiveness?

Forgiveness?

You keep asking me these questions

Knowing you really don’t want to know the answer

I know I’m alone, but that doesn’t mean I’m lonely

It is absolutely intentional

Based on how people treat me

I know every time I see you

You looking at me because I’m solo

But at least if I am the only one here

I will already know

How everything is about to go

I’m telling you I am good

From sun up to sun down

I do not need you in my business

Forgiveness?

Forgiveness?

When the night becomes clear

That is the part that is anchored in fear

Would I be as strong as I claim to be

If everyone that did anything

I allowed to continually hurt me

How am I missing out on life?

You know how this thing go

You meet them

You trust them

They take you for granted

They take your last bit of trust

Now they look real different

That is why I am suspicious.

Forgiveness.

Forgiveness.

I get what you saying

Because I have yet to let go

From each and every hurt and pain

Right now

That is all I know

I know how to be hurt

I know how to manage pain

And now, somehow

I am creating the exact scenario

That I claim to be letting go

I am my worst enemy

Counting nights minutes

Forgiveness.

Forgiveness

I see you

I remember I saw you a while back

When I turned away

When they stabbed me in the back

I walked right past you

I just didn’t know it was you

I just thought as long as I keep this wall up

I would always be strong enough

Now this same wall grown so tall

I cannot see anything

Not a single joy or smile

Please accept my apology

Please forgive me.